


On Leaving

by claudia603



Category: Lord of the Rings (2001 2002 2003)
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-11-14
Updated: 2010-11-14
Packaged: 2017-10-13 04:58:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/133205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/claudia603/pseuds/claudia603
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How Frodo's leaving affects Merry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	On Leaving

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sophinisba](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophinisba/gifts).



“You’re leaving me?” The lad’s eyes welled with tears, but he blinked them away and wiped them with his sleeve.

“Not forever, dear Merry.” Frodo hugged his smaller cousin. “I’m only off to Hobbiton, to live with Uncle Bilbo.” He could barely hold back an excited grin that reflected the gladness in his heart, but he did hold it back because he did not wish to hurt Merry any further. “I shall visit. I promise. You can come visit me any time you like and hear Uncle Bilbo’s stories!”

The little lad smiled and clapped, and all was well.

 

II

Pippin, Sam, and Fatty had settled into their cozy rooms in Crickhollow. Frodo let his breath linger just an extra wistful moment before blowing out the last candle in the hallway.

If only…if only this could truly be my home.

Without warning, a fierce hand grabbed his upper arm and slammed him against the wall. He gasped for breath as Merry’s trembling fists clutched Frodo’s weskit.

“I couldn’t bear it,” Merry whispered, his eyes fierce, his lips a hair-breadth from Frodo’s.

“You do not know what you are in for.”

“Nor do you.”

“Then we shall walk into darkness together.”

 

III

The crackling fire offered dim comfort against the chill wilderness wind, the occasional otherworldly screech that froze their hearts, and the awful delirium in Frodo’s eyes. Frodo worsened by the moment, especially after the rough march up the craggy hill. And still they were so far from aid. Wringing his hands with helpless grief, Merry met Strider’s gaze, looking there for strength, but instead he saw grave concern and that froze Merry’s heart deeper than any Ringwraith’s cry.

Merry clutched Frodo’s cold hand and let his tears fall on it. He hoped they would thaw the evil frost. “Not now…”

 

IV

“He’s going to leave us, Pip,” Merry whispered, drawing his cloak close, shivering against the constant drizzle that had followed them along the Anduin. It was Pippin’s turn to help Boromir row the Elvish boat, and Merry used his break from duties to watch Frodo. After so many years he believed he could read Frodo’s heart better than anyone, even Sam. Now he saw in Frodo a lonely, reflective torment that perhaps had existed in him since Gandalf’s fall into Shadow but had only increased tenfold since Lothlorien.

“He won’t,” Pippin said slowly. “He needs us.”

“He doesn’t know that.”

 

V

 

The sea twinkled like thousands of glimmering tears. Pippin wept and Sam gazed at the gray horizon in open grief, but Merry only listened to the waves hiss upon the shore. This time he had not begged Frodo to stay.

“Not even his beloved Shire could help him,” Pippin said, his voice cracking with misery.

“He was fading, even while everything else was growing,” Sam said, shaking his head. “He wouldn’t have survived the winter.”

Merry had known this, and that was why his eyes remained dry and his heart sang with joy.

He’s left me for the last time.


End file.
